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What’s up, pack — Max here, your resident treat critic and occasional chaos coordinator. Today we’re spotlighting a true Maui icon: Bodhi , the sleek, black-coated heartbreaker who has made it his personal mission to attend every  party with cake on the menu. Bodhi isn’t shy about his priorities. You can keep your squeaky toys and your tennis balls — this guy’s RSVP reads: “Will attend if Dogs & Cakes are involved.” Rumor has it, he once appeared at a birthday party uninvited

We hit the beach. Yes—the beach. Where the sun scorches, the strangers stink, and the ocean laughs in my face. I go there for one reason: The Ball. Thrown by Mom. Only Mom. Not Kyle. Not Tiffany. Not the woman who speaks to me in baby talk and mistakes me for a child’s toy.

We took a neighborhood walk today. And by we , I mean me (the star) plus the tall one who holds the leash. As I’m gliding through the...

excuse you!

You want the savage truth? “Come” is just human for “let me disappoint you.” Treat? Maybe. Bath? Probably. Nail trim? Definitely. That’s why I don’t budge until I’ve negotiated terms. Humans aren’t consistent, so why should I be?

Oh … look at you. Front row. Backstage pass. VIP collar tag. You’ve made it into The Pro Pack — the exclusive, scandalous, and utterly...

Max & The Whippet